News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Randomize