Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
that may or may not have been my penis.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Randomize