We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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