we're chasing vodka with high fives
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
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