after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
