I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
He kissed a someone with a penis
31 Times Kim Kardashian Showed Her Love For Balmain
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
19 Tricks To Help You Join The Mile High Club
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.