what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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