My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Randomize
