so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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