i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
Randomize