Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Randomize
