he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
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