I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
Randomize