Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
I would fuck him just for his dog
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
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