Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
The struggles of a small town man whore
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
