Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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