so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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