Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
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