need another drink. this is the easiest way
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
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just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
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My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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