the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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