I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Randomize