The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
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