no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Randomize