thus making me awesome and them whores
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
