Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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