Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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