What a fucking waste of an outfit
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
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