so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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