You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Randomize
