Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Randomize
