Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Randomize
