Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
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