For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
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