Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
What drink are we having for lunch?
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Randomize
