I'm jealous of your bromance
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Randomize
