so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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