I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
