Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
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