Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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