Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
Randomize
