We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
