Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
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