What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Everything about him screamed your future.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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