love makes seman taste better
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
