i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
i think i just naturally attract stoners
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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