im drinking this country out of the recession.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
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