i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
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