Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
Randomize
