The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize