how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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